I Heart Matt Very Much

So recently (thanks to FB) I came across BuzzFeed’s Matt Bellassai.  He has a piece called “Whine About It” where he gets drunk at his desk once a week (I’m just assuming it’s once a week) and whines about something.

WhineAboutIt-MB1

His insights are hysterical.  I love quotes.  Like the kind you can bring up in a conversation and Matt is way quotable.  Here is a sampling of things I had to write down because they were pure genius (or just funny).

1.  “This is supposed to be Pinot Grigio.  I don’t know why it is pink.”
2.  “Everybody has those interest you crumbled vanilla saltine!”
3.  “If I wanted to spend the whole night waiting I’d sit outside Zac Ephron’s house like a normal person.”
4.  “…hold up a nice burrito you caught by yourself”

Even the people who comment on his weekly videos are hysterical.

“Online dating is so dangerous.  My Mom did it once and got married.  Now she lives in the suburbs and eats kale.  KALE.” ~ Margaret.

MB

He even used One Direction tape to be a two-fisted drinker.  Matt has deep insight into the world and has the gust to share these insights with all of us.  Listen up people!

Also, what a genius…he gets PAID to get drunk at his desk and ramble on about stuff.  We’ve all done this drunk and on more than one occasion not so drunk!  GENIUS!!!

So in short…I want to be Matt Bellassai when I grow up.  Okay he’s 25 and I’m almost 50 but the fact is I haven’t grown up yet so I could still aspire to be like this 25-year-old man.

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