Category Archives: Random Crap

Everything In My Life Comes Back To Ghostbusters

It happened again yesterday.  Someone said “Shut it down, shut it all down”.   I of course went back to Ghostbusters.

“Everything was okay until old dickless shutdown the power grid.” ~ Ray Stantz
“Is that true?” ` The Mayor
“Yes, it’s true, this man has no dick.” ~ Peter Vinkman

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Some would find my life sad.  I find it hysterical.  I’m weird like that!

Winter Time

It’s been a very mild winter thus far in the Mid-Atlantic Region of the US.  I’m not complaining mind you.  It’s not as shocking to the purse because the heat doesn’t come on every 5 seconds and we’ve had sufficient rain so far that this shouldn’t be a drought year.

On Gray days like this I force myself to get out into the open air even if it’s for 15 minutes.  Sometimes this happens…

 

It was an awesome 15 minutes.  I had to go back to work but I went back feeling a little more refreshed.  I do from time to time miss the snow, but today was a pretty nice.

The World Is A Mess Garp

This morning I’m reading the news and I realized this world is getting worse by the minute.  Let me narrow down my angst.  Donald Trump!

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Is this really the best the GOP can come up with to run our country.  I get that people like that he speaks his mind.  That’s great.  He can because he’s a billionaire.   So if he goes to Washington and acts/speaks the same way as does now what does he think is going to happen.  Look who is in Congress…millionaires.  They do not care if he wants something.  He degrades women, anyone not white and thinks his Military School attendance is the same as being in the Military.

All I’ve got to say is oh my goodness.  I might really have to vote for Smokey The Bear because at least he’s good in a crisis, lol.

Zac Ephron Is Pretty To Look At

My Wife and I were having a discussion one day about what people were on the list.  You know the fictitious list we all have of “if I were single and they were interested” list.  It’s a list of celebrities that would never really have anything to do with us but we can all dream can’t we.  I mean look at Ross Geller, lol!

The conversation came around to Zac Ephron.  My Wife said, “he’s so pretty to look at”.  I thought about it for a second and agreed.

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Then I Googled Mr. Ephron.  He is pretty to look at and he’s come a long way from High School Musical.

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I then threw Chris Evans into the mix.  The Wife wasn’t swayed by Captain America.

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She was all about Zac Ephron.  I totally get it and lets face it.  She’s right Zac Ephron is pretty to look at.

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Even if he has a shirt on.

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What a cutie!  I would like him to deliver my groceries every week 🙂

Pet Peeve #71 – Stupid Baby Names

Sid and I often discuss stupid names people subject their children too.  I get that people want their children to have a ‘special and unique’ name but seriously people y’all is stupid!  Allow me to site some examples.

Sid said to me this morning…”Write this down.  G U L E E N.”  I looked at what I had written and said ‘is this something gluten?’   He laughed heartily and replied “no, that’s a child’s name.  Guess how you pronounce it.”  He stood there smiling at me struggle as I struggled to come up with the correct pronunciation of this poor child’s name.  ‘Guleen’ I stammered.  Laughing he said, “no, its pronounced Julian.”  ‘Of course it is’ I laughingly shot back at him.

Part of my pet peeve is the parents that get angry because people mispronounce their children’s name.  When this happens I want to shoot back at them ‘next time don’t make shit up and people will be able to pronounce it!’

I get that people want to be original in their names but what ends up happening is the child ends up with something stupid because their parents wanted something ‘special’ for their little one.  Celebrities are the worst offenders.  Case in point:

Pilot Inspektor – Jason Lee
North West – Kimye’s baby
Ever Imre Morissette-Treadway – Alanis Morrissette
Moxie Crimefighter Jillette – Penn Jillette

The list goes on and on.  When they are little it’s not problem with weird names but when they get older don’t be surprised if they get made fun of because kids can be mean.  Oh and yes I’m being all Judgey McJudgerson about this issue.

p.s.  It rained again today 😦

My Many Faces of RA and It Doesn’t Stand For Really Awesome

Rheumatoid Arthritis sucks donkey butt.  I’ve been very busy the last couple of weeks and that doesn’t leave room for resting.  The weather hasn’t been exactly been helping my cause either but thankfully my wife is a living saint and puts up with my moaning and groaning.  Thanks Babe!

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Sometimes the pain makes me angry.

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Sometimes it just makes me feel defeated.

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Other times I feel a little crazy.

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In the end I have come to the realization that no matter how much I hurt, feel depressed, slow down or just am in a bad mood it’s all just transient.  There’s always hope I will go back into remission.  Ah…remission you are both awesome and brutal because when you go away you take some of that hope with you.  I’m all about the LIVIN’ and that’s just what I will always do…so bring it!

Here endth my pity party.  I’m going to go look at the squirrels…you know cause its fun!

We Are Not Alone and Other Conspiracies

I notice basically innocuous things and make them completely different in my mind.  Like this morning.  I saw Santa Claus walking his beagle.  Some people would say…’That’s not Santa…it’s an old guy who is portly and has a white beard’.  Those people would be wrong.  It was Santa Claus walking his dog.  I know this for sure because I know Santa uses the same dry cleaner as I so he’s in the ‘hood as they say.

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It’s like the Bubble People.  They are out there….I took pictures…this is how they start…they make Bubble Babies that are all cute in their hermetically sealed pouches and then next thing you know everyone is wrapped in Saran Wrap.  Which makes me think…I forgot to get more Saran wrap yesterday when I went to the store.

Any way…I did see Santa and he looks the same no matter how he’s dress.  Now I need to get back to the squirrels…they’ve been making plans for a global take over of the peanut industry.  Holla!

Justin Bieber Ruined My Friday!

UPDATE: 

Poor Justy…he tweeted ‘Worst Birthday’.  He got turned away from a “hot” club with his teenie-posse and was thus embarrassed.   By then he had put on some clothes so at least he had that going for him.  If he’s this disappointed at 19 what’s he going to be like at 30 when he’s possibly getting hair implants?

Everyone knows I have a HUGE pet peeve where ‘pants on the ground‘ is concerned.  So this diatribe about the same subject won’t shock you.

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Justin Bieber made me very angry (again) with his ridiculous pants.  He’s always holding them up in some way or another.  Last week he was holding them up but using the tight grasp of the penis method.

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Really Justin, Really?  How can you expect anyone to take you seriously if you run around town looking like these pictures.  First off, it is winter in London…put a shirt and coat on.  If you want to show what you look like in your underwear do what other celebrities do…go on vacation and stand on your balcony half-naked.

I’d also like to take this opportunity to apologize to my Mother…I totally get it now 🙂

Meanwhile At The Office…

“Sorry I accidentally punched you in the boob.” ~ Me

“It’s okay.  Actually it’s the best thing that has happened to me so far today.” ~ Momonator

“Wow…that’s harsh.” ~ Me

“Eh…” ~ Momonator

That is so not a good day…just saying.

Apparently My Messenger Bag Has Hands

I have RA.  Because I have RA I prefer easy to open pill bottles.  When you buy OTC they almost always put the child safety caps on them.    They are a pain for me to open…literally.   So when I saw that the cap to my OTC bottle was separated from the bottle and the pills were resting at the bottom of my messenger bag I realized the lining must contain magical hands.

Go ahead...open it...I dare ya, lol.

Go ahead…open it…I dare ya, lol.

I’m not sure if this means I should just put all my child safety bottles in my bag for the bag to open in the future.  I’m so confused 😦  What do you think…Gremlins or ghosts are opening my bottles?