Everything In My Life Comes Back To Ghostbusters

It happened again yesterday.  Someone said “Shut it down, shut it all down”.   I of course went back to Ghostbusters.

“Everything was okay until old dickless shutdown the power grid.” ~ Ray Stantz
“Is that true?” ` The Mayor
“Yes, it’s true, this man has no dick.” ~ Peter Vinkman

a587f3e1c0d858573dc2f3572f6311fd8902df5785fdd0e34f055cc3b279fae8e

Some would find my life sad.  I find it hysterical.  I’m weird like that!

Advertisements

Introducing Our Waitress…The Pyromaniac

Last night we went out to dinner with some friends and it was a lovely evening of catching up.  While waiting for our friends we got a text they were there.  We were sitting in our car waiting for them.  I assumed that the next car would be them.

“Here they come.” ~ Me
“Honey, I don’t remember him being an Asian woman.” ~ Bean
“He’s not an Asian woman?  Are you sure?” ~ Me
“Positive.” ~ Bean
“Oh wait, there they are…, lol” ~ Me

Our waitress who was very nice was having many issues.  First she dropped one of our salads that shattered on the floor.  Oh well these things happen.  There were other things that were odd about her service.  We chalked it off to her probably being new.

Fire

We ordered a desert that has the word “flaming” in it.  When she brought it she dumped the flamed liquid on to the desert.  I became alarmed when some of the flammable liquid dropped on my hands.  I really thought for a second I might catch fire…you know…since the table was on fire along with the dessert.  She giggled while trying to extinguish the table.

“I don’t remember it being on fire so much?” ~ Bean
“It’s because I like fire.” ~ Waitress
[Insert nervous laughter here]

She then went on to say wouldn’t it be funny if I burned down the restaurant and then I came back to work.  It was here that we pointed out a) you’d probably get fired for burning down the restaurant and b) if you burn it down there is no restaurant to come back too.  She laughed and went on her way.

It was definitely a very interesting evening filled with laughs.

She Said I Made Her Laugh

I say things I don’t realize are funny.  My wife said she likes when I make her laugh.

“I smell funny.” ~ Me
“I don’t smell anything.” ~ Bean
“I smell like BO and herbs…I don’t remember eating any herbs.” ~ Me
(Laughter) ~ Bean
“What’s so funny?” ~ Me
“You don’t remember eating any herbs?  Who says that?” ~ Bean

“I’ll get your vitamins.” ~ Me
“You can’t reach them.” ~ Bean
“I use those tongs in the drawer.” ~ Me
(Laughter) ~ Bean

“What did you eat?” ~ Bean
“I didn’t eat anything.” ~ Me
“No, really what did you eat?” ~ Bean
“I didn’t eat anything.  Why what does my breath smell like?” ~ Me
“I don’t know.” ~ Bean
“I threw up. Is that the smell?” ~ Me

We had these conversations in less than an hour of each other.  I say some weird stuff.  Hey she seems to love me anyway.  Yeah for me!

Oh…And What Else Did They Say?

Every once in a while I hear the funniest stuff.  Sometimes it is someone I know or other times a complete stranger.  I try to write them down so I can’t forget them.  Here are a couple…

Big Tuna talking to his iPhone:  Screw you Siri!
Siri:  Please.

Me talking to WW about ringtones on her phone.
Me: 
What’s my Ringtone?
WW:  Lazy…
Bean:  HA HA HA HA
Me:  That’s harsh.


While watching Chopped:

Jeffrey:  I find this dessert too sweet.
Alex:  I find it sweet too.
Me:  It’s the dessert round you idiots!!!!

Tom:  Are they the Pep Boys?
Me:  No that’s Edgar Allen Poe, James Joyce and a Nun.

Over heard at Denny’s:
Little boy to his father:  I’m a vegetarian…I want some ham.

Over heard at Peddler’s Village:
Pretentious Lady:  Do you sell sunglasses for dogs?

An African-American guy I know:
Charles:  I’m blushing like a chocolate covered strawberry.

Frolicking with Scarecrows

Halloween is my Christmas.  Autumn is the most awesome time of the year!  What does this all mean…Fun and Frolic has commenced!!!

This weekend we went to Peddler’s Village for the Scarecrow festival.  Very Cool.


There were reminders of Harvest time…


I brought a little of Hollywood to the occasion with my spider glasses.  This was a miraculous moment as I am totally afraid of Spiders…real or otherwise!


Fabulous…right?

This was my favorite Scarecrow of the event.

While waking out of the “pet store” in the village I actually heard a woman ask….

“Do you sell sunglasses for dogs?”  That my friends is just crazy stuff…but then again I dress my dogs up at Halloween for a photo-op…so there you have it.