Searching For The Cure For Stupidity

Yesterday I got the wonderful opportunity to speak with someone so stupid it left me with a fear of his actually reproducing and thus spreading his stupidity far and wide.

I came home last night to the incessant beeping of the answer machine.  screeching at me to check it before I do anything else.  Well that wasn’t going to happen so I had to listen to this annoying beep for 20 minutes while I took care of the dogs and got other things done.  When I got to the dang machine it had 4 messages.  Mind you, the phone rang twice while I was feeding the dogs but no one left a message.

Perhaps it’s one or more than one of my siblings.  Perhaps it’s my BFF saying she was stopping by to drop of that thing we talked about on Sunday.  No it was Stupid-man.   My phone number must be similar to a dentist in the area phone number.  Each of the messages was about calling this man back.

Let me just say this about my message.  It is generic and says leave a name and number and we’ll call you back.  It sounds like a message a residence would have…not a doctor’s office!  I digress.   The phone rang again and this time I picked it up.  And the ridiculous conversation that followed was well…annoying.

Me:  Hello?
Stupid-man:  Hello, is this the doctor’s office?
Me:  No this is residence.
SM:  Are you sure because I dialed the Doctor’s phone number.
Me:  No you didn’t this is a residence.
SM:  No I know I dialed correctly.  Is this 610-***-****?
Me:  Yes that is my number but this is a residence not a doctor’s office.  You have the wrong number.
SM:  No I don’t I just read it to you and you said it was the right number.
Me: (Angry tone beginning)…Yes that’s my number…No this isn’t a doctor’s office and my guess is you wrote it down incorrectly.
SM:  You should notify the phone company that you and the doctor have the same phone number.
Me:  (Completely Angry now!)…NO…it would be impossible for us both to have the same phone number.
SM:  Well you do.
Me:  We don’t.  You wrote it down wrong and this is a residence.
SM:  I didn’t you both have the same number.
Me:  (Super-duper had enough).  YOU HAVE THE WRONG NUMBER.  Please do not dial the same number again.  Try directory assistance because they can direct your call for you.
SM:  Oh, okay.  Sorry to inconvenience you.
Me:  [CLICK]

Seriously I totally understand that common sense is almost extinct in this world we live it but why, oh why would you argue with a person who is telling you its a wrong number?  Oh yes, my favorite stupid moment was when he suggested that the phone company gave us the same number.  I should have told him that on Monday and Tuesday I get the calls and Wednesday and Thursdays he gets the calls.  I sure hope what’s wrong with him isn’t serious.

And that’s why Mondays are sometimes awful.  Just saying.



  1. You do realize that the doctor probably gave him the wrong number. just imagine – if this was your patient, would you really want him coming back? I sure wouldn’t.

    Yeah, so you’ve got an answering machine? That means a land line, too. That’s kind of illegal here in techie Silicon Valley. I gave up the land line over 7 years ago. It just confused Grandma when I had that and the cell – she never knew what number to call. Now she doesn’t understand how I can talk and drive at the same time. I can’t win.

    Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

  2. I used to get calls from a debt collector for some random guy… who did not (of course) live in my house… and the people on the phone would actually accuse me of “hiding” the guy! I finally told one of them he was welcome to come over and look.

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